Yes, I know it's Wendell Sailor. It really is. No, it's not a good idea for you to approach him and tell him what you think of how he plays Rugby.
No, really, it's not.
You love your Union? Good. Good for you. Think you can do a better job of playing it than Wendell? Fair enough. Your opinion. I'm not qualified to judge. But it is a Bad Idea for you to go and tell him to his face. Really, it is.
Yes, we've all wanted to deck Wendell at some point. I know I have. But tonight, here, now, is not the time. Maybe you could start playing Union, get to represent, like him, at the National level. I'm not a judge of these things, but sure, why not?
If you do that, then you'll get to clobber him in the name of the sport. And that'll be okay. You just don't need to do it now. You really don't.
Why not? Because it'll wreck what's been an otherwise cool night. Because I'm not going to bail you out. I don't care if you win. I really don't. Win or lose, it will be a Bad Thing. So don't. Okay? Maybe you would beat the shit out of him. So?
Good. All right. Just don't. Okay? Don't. Good.
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A transcript of a conversation held with Mr Adam "Take me home I'm about to throw up" Rapkins?
There are a great many people I'd like to deck. But a club is not the place for it, hence no attempt was made.
oh and I did throw up, I threw up a LOT.
No sympathy for those who cannot hold their liquor.
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