Sunday, January 11, 2004

Which Star Trek Captain are you?

Captain McKenzie Calhoun
Mackenzie Calhoun- You are the wild man of
Starfleet. You love outwitting oponents by
doing the one thing they wouldn't expect from a
Starfleet ship... fighting dirty. Of course
to get away with your craftiness, you only
exist in books. Doesn't matter, you're much
cooler than Archer. Some people say you're a
self righteous SOB. They might be right, but
you don't give a damn.


Which Star Trek Captain are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Google Press Center: 2003 Year-End Zeitgeist

Saturday, January 10, 2004

Crap

Some Tard with a PA system down the road sounds like he's invited the rest of his band members over to jam tonight. And so far - they sound like shit (not to mention loud). Ummmm - I think they're trying to do some kind of death metal performance......... oh dear..... loud distored growling....

UPDATE - here is the delightful music I've been listening to. What fun.

Stupid Trek

"I remember one particularly insane argument that Ira and Rick had when Nog was injured and ended up losing a leg, there was this ridiculous extended argument that I was in a room while Ira was on the phone. We had written the draft where he had lost both his legs, and Rick was just appalled. "We can't lose the character's legs!" And we were like, "No, we've got to. We've got to have somebody who's injured in this war who's not just a guest star in the background." It was a very important point. And the argument got to the point where they were arguing about, "Well, does it have to be one leg or two? And is it above the knee or below the knee?" It was just, like, they were negotiating over where Nog was to lose his leg. It was just absurd."
Some pretty interesting things from an interview with Ron Moore, Galactica writer/producer and Trek veteran. Some pretty interesting things about the whole development of the modern Trek franchise.

Friday, January 09, 2004

The Best of 2003: Top 10 Astronomy Images

Britney's 'hubby' gutted
THE ex-girlfriend of Britney Spears' husband for a day tells Inside Edition that despite his claim that it was a mutual decision to seek an annulment, he may actually be broken-hearted his marriage to the pop star ended so quickly.


Alchemy of a Supermetal
Serendipity delivers a process that may cut the cost of a high-tech material

Review: Athlon 64 3400+


Space station air purifier may be leaking
Flight controllers suspect an air purifier may be leaking aboard the international space station and causing the biggest prolonged loss of pressure ever seen at the 5-year-old orbital complex.

How the Army used tech to nab Saddam
When American troops conducted a night raid that led to the capture of Saddam Hussein in December, digital technology allowed Army commanders miles away to watch virtually every move.

Cash-strapped Germany building $285,200 frog tunnel
Germany's cash-strapped government is paying 225,000 euros (U.S. $285,200) to build a tunnel to help frogs avoid the perils of a busy road, officials said Monday.


Frozen Stars. Black holes may not be bottomless pits after all
Demolishing stars, powering blasts of high-energy radiation, rending the fabric of spacetime: it is not hard to see the allure of black holes. They light up the same parts of the brain as monster trucks and battlebots do. They explain violent celestial phenomena that no other body can. They are so extreme, in fact, that no one really knows what they are.

NASA Looks for an Emergency Exit
Not since the Apollo moon shots have astronauts had an escape pod in case of an emergency during launch, but that safety measure will be central to NASA's next generation of spacecraft.

Microsoft Ads Called Bogus
Open-source advocates are crying foul over a new ad campaign from Microsoft that claims that Windows-based systems cost less in the long run than Linux-based systems.

Aussie guide to another Earth
IF there is life on other planets, an Australian team of astronomers has just found the region in our Milky Way galaxy where it is most likely to exist.

Astronomers find sun's 'twin'
Astronomers say the sun has a twin in the left claw of Scorpio. The solar twin is 18 Scorpii, located in the constellation Scorpio, a mere 46 light years from earth.

Open-Source Community Defends GPL Against SCO Attack
The open-source community is rallying against comments made by The SCO Group CEO Darl McBride late last month that the GPL, under which Linux and open-source software is distributed, violates the U.S. Constitution as well as copyright and patent laws.

Drunk driver wrecks 11 parked cars
FEAR neighbours might damage his precious Range Rover overnight prompted the vehicle's owner to move it while three times over the alcohol limit, but instead he rammed it into a total of 11 cars, Britain's Daily Telegraph reported today.

Get The FUD
Microsoft is calling its new anti-Linux ad campaign "Get the Facts," but I call it "Get the FUD."


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A wholly subsidiary of
Screaming Blue Wombat Inc. /
Avenging Green Seahorse Industries

Sidebar Update

If anyone wants their sidebar picture updated - supply me with a better one.
NEW BLOG LAYOUT
unfortunately I have not been able to leave a comment...click the comment like to see what i mean.

Also there is no number next to the comment link indicating if there are any comments.

Otherwise: I like the background.
and perhaps we should have some more images of us down the side? (below the links to wbloggar and blogger etc.

Thursday, January 08, 2004

Renovations

Am bored with current look of blog. Will be fiddling with it's appearance over next day or so.

Update - finished with first overhaul. What do people think? Comments/Suggestions/Pointing out bits I broke?

Wednesday, January 07, 2004

Brain Bugs
White Trash Of The Year

Britney Spears' two-day-old marriage to a childhood friend was dissolved Monday shortly after the pop superstar filed for an annulment, claiming she didn't fully understand what she was doing when she got hitched on the spur of the moment.....The bride wore a baseball cap and torn jeans down the aisle and was escorted by a Palms limousine driver, the source told the AP. more here

Once Upon A Time in Mexico


Once Upon A Time in Mexico - the third in Robert Rodriguez's El Mariachi trilogy seems to have banished to release date oblivion - which before I'd watched the film seemed a real pity. Now I kind of understand why. It's a crazy kind of film, with a semblance of a plot which often seems to be ignored whenever it might interfere with any kind of action piece.

What it does show however, is that Rodriguez can not only handle the action set pieces, but has a bit of a warped sense of humour.

This is a rambling commentary while watching the movie - so it's full of spoilers and might not make much sense...

Didn't Cheech Marin die in the second movie???

None of this guitar cases hiding machine guns bullshit - this time the guitar's a freaking machine gun :)

The movie is only slightly over the top. More deaths in the first 5 minuits that you get in the average action film :) Heaps of fun.

Huzzah - Johnny Depp overacting - what fun :)

Does Antonio Banderas only own one set of clothing?

I thought the whole point of shooting The Mariachi's in the hand was so that he couldn't play the guitar anymore? I guess he's gotten better...

Good to see Robert Rodriguez makes flicks and not films.

Danny Trejo - another person who's character died in the second film. I guess all Mexians do look alike....

Nothing like seeing a character shot once with a rifle flying five metres back in the air off the stool they were sitting on. Movie Physics are always a good thing...

Mickey Rourke (with chiuaua), Willem Dafoe, Johnny Depp - what a scenery-chewing cast.

It sucks when people speak Spanish, and there aren't any subtitles :(

"Are you a Mexi-Can, or a Mexi-Can't?"....

I love the lack of reality in films such as this. We all know that women who look like Eva Mendes end up working for the police force in their anti-narcotics division....

Shit - 10 minuites without gunfire - unless you count Depp's characters senseless shooting of a poor innocent cantina cook who's only crime was making him dinner.... Ahh here we go - flash-back involving chains, firy arguements with Salma Hayek - and fully automatic gun-fire from assault rifles - that's more like it.

He's just ripped off that same shot of the hero sliding onto a moving bus for the third film in a row. And the bus has just crashed into a convinently passing fuel tanker. Result = firey explosion. Naturally.

WTF ??? Silencers on assault rifles???

Spurs may sound cool, but it makes it really hard to sneak around on tiles.

Shoot-up in the chapel - is nothing sacred? I think they managed to trash every pew in the church.

Ouch!!! That bull really fucked up that matador. I guess that's what happens when your belt explodes as a bull is charging you. It's kinda distracting.

Geez - how many flash-backs do we need to get across the point that he's mourning the death of Hayek's character! And now she's pregnant. Even sader...

Geez - Depp really likes shooting people...

There are convoluted plots. There are convoluted plots. And then there's this movie. This is all over the place

Huzzah - three Mariachis. All carrying guitar cases. I don't think they're here to play a three-part harmony. Maybe a harmony of death.

Banderas only seems to wear one spur. He clanks with every second step. Wierd.

Woman should learn - you hook up with The Mariachi - you're not long for this world.

Now we get to see people cleaning up the chapel they shot up earlier in the film. Cute. Must be spending the money The Mariachi looted from the dead bodies and left in the poor box.

Where the fuck did all these gun men come from? They're everywhere? And they can't shoot for shit. At least they die spectacularly.

Insane chase scene - and the hero still gets caught. Oh well.

Ohh - Trejo just died. And I'm not exactly sure why.... This is one confusing film...

More flashbacks - tho these ones are drug-addled - so I'm not sure how accurate they are. How sad - the Mariachi had kids.... And they died too.... Nasty General for killing poor Mariachi's loved ones...

Okay - they're going to tortute the Mariachi - but they fail to tie him up. So his response is to rip his captors' testicles off (at least - I think that's what that sound was...)

Umm Dafoe is now undergoing plastic surgery - why??? This movie is very confusing. Not to mention he had the surgey without full anasthetic. He must be crazy...

That's the second time the retired FBI agent has waved his unloaded revolver around. Buy some bullets man. Hooray - he finally has.

Okay... The gunmen who were chasing the doctor, are now helping him into a car. Again - I feel like I'm missing large parts of this movie's plot.

Ohhh - Defoe's character had his face skinned. Nice..... But they're switched bodies - because his rings don't fit. Crafty... Oooh - so now it looks like Defoe's character is running around - minus a face... Freaky...

Now its the Mexican Day of the Dead. So you know things will get even wierder...

And now Eva Mendes' character has betrayed Johnny Depp - the bitch. And now I think they're going to steal his face!!! Or maybe just his eyeballs.... I don't know what other reason a grasping claw needs a drill in the middle of it for...

Depp's got blood all over his face - they must have stolen his eyeballs. Poor boy... And now he's getting a 12 year old to shoot a guy who's following him with a gun he pulled out of his groin...

No eyes and Depp still manages a head shot!!!

Military Coup!!! M-60's!!! Bazooka's!!! Big Bangs!!! Tanks!!! Mariachi's on the move!!! Hooray!!!

"I can't see fuckmook! I have no eyes!" But he does have a small Mexican child who seems to be happy to follow him and hand him his guns...

And now a mobile taco stand has turned into a machine gun emplacement!!! The Mexican peasants are really get into the spirit of revolution.

Who knew guitar cases make such excellent stair surfboards...

Boring, the Mariachi's are only playing with hand-guns... Now they've brought out the flame throwers!!! And remote controlled guitar cases packed with explosives!!! Excellent!!!

How do these bullets blow holes through people while blowing them 10 metres across the room at the same time???

And the Mariachi's are protecting the President!!! "Sons of Mexico" indeed.

Eyelless Johnny Depp with his Mach 10 verses the Mexican bad guys. He's like Daredevil. Only without the red leather gimp suit and with machine guns. And better looking woman who actually do shit to harm him instead of just talking about it...

And now the peasants are beating the snot out of the military. It looks like the escapees from a KISS concert have gotten their hands on the bazookas.

Ooohh - stand-off. Evil Mexican General verses The Grief-stricken Revenge-seeking Mariachi. Who will win???? The Mariachi literally BLEW HIS KNEECAPS OFF!!! Hardcore.

And now Dafoe-without-a-face has turned up with his evil good-looking turn-coat daughter. And Johnny just shot her - right between her breasts - with his fake arm!!! And now he's dead. How sad.

Geez - that sawn-off The Mariachi is packing sure is accurate over long distances...

A gloved hand rises. Johnny Lives!!! As his little Mexican Boy comes back to help him.

And the Mariachi's - stuffed full of cash - are wandering along the road-side - escorting El Presidente to his limo. I guess they just do that...

And now - The Mariachi - draped in the Mexican flag - is striding purposefully along the road-side having avenged his wife's murder, and now appears to have a new purpose in life. Although what that purpose is I'm not sure. Gun-toting avenger of the Mexican people?

Maybe I need to watch it again, but that was one confusing movie. It seemed like a mish-mash of half a dozen seperate movies. But the halfs all came from different films, so nothing really added up to one coherent story-line. Yet again, The Mariachi is driven to avenge the murder of a loved one one, which again happened before the movie started (though we're yet again shown itin flashback. I guess Salma Hayek is too big a star now to get involved in the breast-baring scenes that were among the highlights of Desperado...). Despite this , the movie seems to forget that THE MARIACHI HAD HIS HAND SHOT TO SHIT SO HE CAN'T PLAY MARIACHI GUITAR ANYMORE!!! Oh well, still plrenty of gun-fire, explosions, flying bodies and mayhem. Just a pity it's such a flawed film, following on from such a good flic like Desperado.
STACKPOLE
If anyone is ordering The Grand Crusade then let me know

Tuesday, January 06, 2004

A Conversation with Lance

Lance: this is funny
Lance: i have more teaching experience than a B. Ed who has been teaching for one year
Lance: i have designed 3 exams,. and administered ummm 10 or more

Grant: heh...interesting ain't it?
Lance: and have done 3 course outlines
Lance: and am putting together suplimental material for 4 courses

Grant: thats an impressive list
Lance: AND I AM AN I.T. GRAD!~!!!!!! Fot the love of god!!!
Lance: God is fucking with me!!!!!!!
Lance: And i can hear the bastard laughing at me!

Grant: I am going to post that to the blog
Lance: hehehe sweet!

It's Out


The question is - does Nick have a copy yet? :)

Monday, January 05, 2004

Stupid American TV

Watching the third season of 24 and it has become abundantly clear to me that the show should be named Dumb Buxom Blondes Who Always Get in Trouble. Each season, the show seems to add at least two blondes, usually in exchange for the single brunette that they bumped off in some fashion the previous season. If you're a new blonde on this show, you seem destined to be kidnapped by the season's bad guys at least once...

Not to mention the fact that CTU seems to have the worst background screening policies of any high risk Government agency known to man.

Oh well, at least no-one's been menaced by a cougar so far this season...

Bonjour Monsieur


The people responsible for Badgers and their various incarnations have come out with a new one - Bonjour Monsieur.

WARNING: Does not contain badgers, but may contain genitals.

Sunday, January 04, 2004

CHILDREN OF DUNE
I have just watched Children Of Dune. I found it a little bit confusing (so I will just have to make myself watch it again, damn! ;~] )

Rather different to the fist mini-series. The first episode of Children Of Dune is almost a complete story by itself, I assume that this is basically Dune Messiah.

There is a lot of plots-within-plots-within-plots which keeps you busy throughout.

I, personally, would have liked to see more of Gurney, even in the first one, and Duncan could have been used better.

There have been many actor changes from the first series to this one. Lady Jessica is different as is Stilgar (he is now the bad dude from Beverly Hills Cop).

All in all I liked it.

I, Cringely
Two Steps Forward, Two Steps Back: Bob's Predictions for 2004

From 2003:
I predicted that Microsoft's Palladium security plan, now called Trustworthy Computing, would be distrusted and stall. That looks right to me.

...correctly predicted that V.92 modem development would stall, but that nobody would care.


For 2004:
6) As for SCO, they'll continue to make noise until the middle of the year, at which point the legal case will implode and the company will give up. By that time, the company executives, insiders, and major investors will have all sold their positions at a handsome profit. This was never more than a stock scam, pushing the price of SCO shares up by more than 15 times. The clever part is how they used a legal case to make public claims that would have caused serious regulatory problems in any other context. We'll see more of this ploy in the future.

15) Microsoft will open its wallet here and in Europe, settling a ton of lawsuits, paying billions of dollars, but though the money will flow, no lessons will be learned on any side. Nor will Bill Gates achieve this year his dream of winning a Nobel Peace Prize. I am not making this up.

I Can't Believe I Just Read That...


The Straight Man's Guide to Enjoying Gay Sex is an article that categorises various activities as gay or not. I read it. I'm still not sure why.

So I thought I'd share the bewilderment.

Karma

This is what happens when you choose to look a gift horse in the mouth Steve. You could have retired last season a hero. Instead it looks like you'll be leading Australia to an inglorious defeat in your final test. Still, this was the bowling attack you wanted (17 no balls..... a player who did that wouldn't be in my first choice team....)

From one of my favourite reports on this unfolding debarcle.
Waugh's farewell has thus far consisted of diving stops, futile chases to the fence, and the furrowed brow. The only bowler exempt from criticism was Jason Gillespie, as magnificent in patches today as he was in another futile burst, at Chennai in the deciding Test of 2001. Sadly, he was backed up by some who would struggle to get into an England side, and for Australians, there can be no greater insult.

Brett Lee pumped his fists and celebrated as though the score was 5 for 70, rather than 5 for 570, when he dismissed Sourav Ganguly. If he paid as much attention to bowling a decent line and length as he does to theatrics, he'd be one of the greats, a worthy foil for Gillespie. As it is, he's not even close. Gillespie's tremendous opening burst in the morning – when Tendulkar was feeling his way back into the game – was utterly negated by Lee's dross, which Laxman creamed through cover and midwicket with disdain.

Saturday, January 03, 2004

heh

Winamp 5
For all those btiching about how Winamp 3 was not as good as Winamp 2.x then try Winamp 5!

Thursday, January 01, 2004

ROTK

Having just seen the final LOTR film - The Return of the King, here are some thoughts.

Faramir got the short shift again. Get beaten, run away, get beaten again. And wtf happened to the Faramir-Eowyn story? I'm guessing he'll get a fair chunk of storyline reinserted in the Extended Edition ala The Two Towers.

White Tree of Gondor. What was the point? Another victim of timing?

Why no mention of Denethor's Palantir? You know - the thing that helped drive him crazy...

Battle of Pelenor Field = Awesome. Maximum carnage ensues.

Loved the Witch King V Eowyn/Merry show-down. Thought they nailed that perfectly. And at least Merry here wasn't as stupid as the character in failing to recognize Eowyn when she was in disguise (if you can call it thal ...).

Charge of the Rohirim = spectacular. Great demonstration of the effectiveness of cavalry v infantry.

And the returning charge of the Murmakil showed how effective they are v everything else. And was I the only one thinking of the Battle of Hoth during these scenes?

Naturally the obligatory Legolas show-off scene was a big hit. Almost drowned out Gimli's retort.

Okay, who else was piloting those ships of the Umbar Raiders? The ghosts? Must be magic ships...

And just when you thought the movie was over, there was another bit, and then another bit, and another, and another... Almost as if Peter Jackson didn't want to say goodbye.

What will be interesting now is to see where Peter Jackson goes as a director. From a little-known New Zealand splatter film director to one of the most sought after film-makers in the world who has managed to make not only commercially successful, but critically acclaimed movies.

Making movies of this magnitude can take alot of a film-maker (just look at Copolla's output following Apocalypse Now). Is this the apex of Jackson's film-making or has he still got better films in him? I guess King Kong will tell...

Saturday, December 27, 2003

Thursday, December 25, 2003

'Tis The Season To Be Jolly


But does any fucker seem to actually be jolly tonight? Jesus H. Christ on a pogo stick, did anyone have a happy Christmas?

Eight hours on the fucking phones. Eight. Fucking. Hours.

Yes, the job's still good... but every job has its downsides. Tonight has been one of them.

Wednesday, December 24, 2003

¥Ãž¥·¥Ã³¥Ã­¥Ãœ¥Ã¬¥¹¥­¥Ã¥¡¼ÂµÃ¦¶Ã‹¹Ã§Ã‚ÃŽ¤Ã‹Ã„©Ã€Ã¯
- Just add more robots.
Amazon.co.uk: DVD: Press Gang - Complete Series 1 [1990] - I think I shall have to order this...

Chermside = Madhouse

Okay - just gotten back from Chermside - where they're trialling having the centre open for the 36 hours before Christmas. And judging by what's going on down there, it'll be happening everywhere next year.

The queues to get into the place where backed up for blocks. People were parking in Marchant Park and the walking down to Chermside - rather than risk the insanity of trying to find a park.

Want to know just how many people where down at Chermside tonight? Well, this was the car park at 10 o'clock at night.

And this was inside of Chermside - at midnight

Basically, as I said - Chermside = Madhouse.

Monday, December 22, 2003

An Easy Mistake To Make... I Guess.


I was on the phones again all night tonight. And I found a common theme among a bunch of people who called up. A lot of them seemed to think it was a good idea to beat their chest and talk about how they were going to hurt other people 'if they try it again' - sometimes as extreme as stabbing them in response to a punch.

Now, people, this is something that is known as a Bad Idea. Because when you say it on the phone on 000, you are being taped. When the person answering the phone says the call is recorded, you are being taped. And when you express the intention to kill someone - even if it's in response to provocation - you do Serious Harm to your defense in a possible murder trial.

True, if you're doing it only in response to provocation, it's probable you'll be able to escape a life sentence. You won't escape jail, though, unless you get sent to a mental institution. (I guess it could be argued that anyone stupid enough to announce their intention to kill someone when they're being taped might as well be clinically insane.) Self-defense is a valid defense against a murder charge, but there are some catches. The big one, the one that is really important, is that they need to be trying to kill you (or someone close to you, I guess).

Fair enough, if there's bad blood between you, a case could be made that the reason they were found dead at your hands was that you killed them in self-defense. However, if you're on record as stating your intention to kill someone regardless of the extremity of their actions - that blows a big hole in your defense. A big, going to jail to become someone's bitch kind of hole.

The other one is the concept of 'commensurate show of force'. In plain terms, self-defense needs to be a reasonable response in the circumstances. If someone punches you in the face and you shoot them in theirs, you're out of luck. Pulling a gun against a knife can be valid, but you'd need to establish the circumstances pretty well. ("He looked really threatening in my scope, officer...")

The law is pretty strict when it comes to self-defense. An example of this that came from my Mobil armed robbery course - if you were being held up, pulled a gun out from behind the counter and shot the guy who was holding you up and killed him - self-defense. However, if you gave him the money and shot him as he was leaving... murder (again, maybe not first-degree, but still murder). Once you're out of clear danger from someone, you cannot claim self-defense.

I guess this is just another note in my campaign to allow us to blow up the phones of stupid people. But that's still a long way off. Curse human rights. :(

On another note, I had a really ominous email at work. The acting inspector was asking me to come see them about it, copies had been sent to a number of places, a big note 'to be placed on employee's file' on it, so I was kind of nervous to check the attached file.

It was a 'well done'. A nice lady (yes, we do get nice callers, it's just that the annoying ones are the ones who get the rants) who I'd helped out had called back to thank me. I can't really go into more details, unfortunately (curse professional confidentiality!) but it really chuffed me. Coming as it did near the end of my shift, it restored my battered faith in humanity. Somewhat.

Though I swear people in general still don't know how to enjoy themselves.
NEWS.com.au | ALP 'beer for votes' claim (December 22, 2003) - Labor Party. Electoral Rorting. They're words you normally never see in the same sentence are they.....

Tasteless, But Funny

I guess if you're offended by ethnically insensitive humour, you can just bugger off now.
Two families move from Pakistan to Australia. When they arrive the two fathers make a bet. In a year's time whichever family has become more Australian will win.

A year later they meet again. The first man says, "I have changed my name to Trevor, my son is playing AFL, I had a meat pie with sauce for breakfast and I'm just about to jump in my Commodore and go to the pub to pick up a slab of VB, how about you?"

The second man replies...



"Fuck off, towelhead."
From Right-Thinking
NEWS.com.au | Greens co-founder 'Labor stooge' (December 22, 2003) - can anyone say they're really suprised.....
SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW - MUST SEE TRAILER!!!!!!!* Spitfires verses Robots of Death!!!!!

Only drawback - the horrible Paltrow thing is in it.

Sunday, December 21, 2003

None Shall Pass

blackknight
Running away? You yellow . . .


What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Saturday, December 20, 2003


French Guard
I'm French! Why do think I have this outrageous
accent, you silly king-a?!


What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

French Guard
I'm French! Why do think I have this outrageous
accent, you silly king-a?!


What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


On another note, insomnia sucks.

Friday, December 19, 2003

What Monty Python Character are you?

lancelot
Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who!


What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
New York Daily News - Crime File - 5 arraigned in cop & gown mugging fest - "We don't like to hurt nobody." - the why the hell do you mug them dickhead?
The Official Ninja Webpage: REAL Ultimate Power!!!! - can't remember if this has been posted before, but damn it's a funny site.
Fight Club Screens for PlayStation 2 at GameSpot - all I can say is What the fuck???
bad mother fucker wallet from pulp fiction & where to buy the wallet
NEW Gift Wrap for this year


Battlestar Galactica (2003)

The following are my musing whilst watching the Sci-Fi Channel's latest mini-series - Battlestar Galactica. Keep in mind Galactica was a series I obsessed over as a child, but have tried to avoid in later years for fear of tarnishing my cherished memories.

The following may contain spoilers. If you've that worried - too bloody bad - I can't be arsed inviso-texting it.
********
First 40 minutes everyone is either fighting or screwing.

Subtlety is not an Americans strongpoint. How do we show that the blonde supermodel robot is evil? We have her snap a baby's neck (off camera of course!).

Since when did Cylons = sexbots?

Most startling change so far? Starbuck's now a woman. As well, Boomer who was a black man, is now an asian woman. And this change is because? Good question.

Almost an hour till we get to the blowing shit up - it's called Battlestar for a reason guys.

At least they didn't redesign the Vipers - one of the coolest looking starfighters ever.

At least the Cylons didn't waste time when trashing the 12 Colonies - 50 kilo-ton nukes all the way!!!

The Galactica is a relic of the first Cylon war - so none of the computers are networked and all the equipment (phones, headsets, etc) are chorded (nothing wireless). Very cool.

Too many small cute children subtly pointing out how terrible the loss of life and family is during war... It's called Battlestar people!!!

Madam President (who was Education Secretary) = boring. I love West Wing, but not in space! Again, it's called Battlestar people!!! And of course she's a bleeding-heart leftie to fight with Cmdr Adama.

Oh No!!! The cute kiddie we just met has to die because her ship can't travel FTL & the Cylons are attacking!!! Oh the humanity!!!

And now everyone's bonking again!!! If Apollo & Starbuck start screwing I'm going to cry.

At last - an upgraded Cylon who isn't a supermodel.

Lingerie Model Cylon is back. And she's psycho-analyzing wimpy British Baltar (apparently it's a rule in American TV, all British accented characters = wimpy). .....and she's trying to have sex with him again (even though she's a figment of his imagination... I think).

Oh god - Starbuck was in love with Apollo's brother.

Goodie - they've arrested the journalist (like all journalists should be).

And naturally there's a secret Cylon onboard the Galactica so we get to play 'guess the spy'. Woohoo - paranoia abounds.

Still no seatbelts on capital ships in the future.

Did I mention how much Viper's rock!

Always amazes me when people are allowed to smoke on a spaceship. Must be good oxygen recyclers/scrubbers.

And as the final shot of the show - they reveal the Secret Cylon!!! Good thing for them there's going to be more of this show (apparently) - otherwise that'd be a real shitty ending.
********
On the whole - not too bad. The acting was painful at times, and there was far too much soulful attempts at adding depth and pathos to the tragic characters (I said attempts - I don't indicate they were successful) and not enough of the big space shooties. After all, why have such fancy efforts if you're not going to use them!!! And not enough Cylons dammitt!!! (except the one with her tits falling out - but she doesn't count - she's not a real Shiny SilverTM Cylon).

As for the redesigned Cylons (not the SexBot Cylons - the others. Remember how Unkie George sued the Battlestar guys the first time around. When the new bots look an awful lot like most of the droid armies seen in the first two SW prequels...

Still any sci-fi that isn't raping the corpse of Star Trek or Gene Roddenbery's margin doodles is a good thing. But then again, this is the Sci-Fi channel - the bastards that cancelled Farscape.

Thursday, December 18, 2003

I am...


Which Family Guy Character are you? Take the Quiz!
A Quiz For People Who Know Everything

(1) There's one "sport" in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends. What is it?

(2) What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?

(3) Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?

(4) Name the only sport in which the ball is always in possession of the team on defense, and the offensive team can score without touching the ball?

(5) What fruit has its seeds on the outside?

(6) In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?

(7) Only three words in standard English begin with the letters "dw." They are all common. Name two of them.

(8) There are fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name half of them?

(9) Where are the lakes that are referred to in the "Los Angeles Lakers?"

(10) There are seven ways a baseball player can legally reach first base without getting a hit. Taking a base on balls-a walk-is one way. Name the other six.

(11) It's the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh. What is it?

(12) Name six or more things that you can wear on your feet that begin with the letter "S."


Answers.

1. Boxing.

2. Niagara Falls. The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute.

3. Asparagus and rhubarb.

4. Baseball.

5. Strawberry.

6. The pear grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the whole growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.

7. Dwarf, dwell, and dwindle.

8. Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation marks, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.

9. In Minnesota. The team was originally known as the Minneapolis Lakers and kept the name when they moved west.

10. Batter hit by a pitch; passed ball; catcher interference; catcher drops third strike; fielder's choice; and being designated as a pinch runner.

11. Lettuce.

12. Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, snowshoes, stockings.

...Well, now you know! Feel any smarter?

News Just In On RotK


Here's what Penny Arcade has to say about Return Of The King...
You may be wondering whether or not this is a good movie. You want to know if the hopes you have invested in it will be dashed, your good heart trampled as it was when you left Episode One - gasping at the naked contempt displayed by George Lucas.

I predict that you will be knocked clean on your ass, in the absence of mercy, pounded by raw craft and quality for the film's over three hour duration. I liked Two Towers well enough, preferred Fellowship, you know, but it'll do. It was better than jabbing your hand into a box of used medical sharps. Return of the King, by comparison, is every element executed with laser-guided precision. At one point, I covered my gaping mouth with the Hordes of the Underdark manual. Yes, I brought it. I'm sort of a big dork, maybe nobody told you.


Read it for yourself here, if you must, but that's really all the review there is. I mainly wanted to post it 'cos of the description of Episode One.

Wednesday, December 17, 2003

Rewriting History

One of the things that really annoys me is the manner in which certain vested interests in the community have a habit accepted by everyone else as the norm, of rewriting history to serve their own purposes. Anyone who's studied Australian history over the last 6-8 years would have seen this activity in practice with what has been labeled the black armband of history being applied to Australia's past, whether warranted or not.

In the last year or so however, there has been no more blatant an attempt to rewrite history by the bleeding heart loony left (you know - the ones who still can't get over the fact that the communists lost) than the whining that surrounds Australia's dealing with so-called refugees arriving on Australia's shores. Probably the worst example of this rewriting, surrounds that of the Tampa affair. You know the one - where a Norwegian container ship came across a sinking ferry which had departed from Indonesia in an attempt to illegally reach the Australian mainland. And when told that they would be returned to the Merak, the port they had departed from, while the Tampa continued on its journey to Singapore, became quite "angry" towards a crew they outnumbers by over 10 to 1.

Now, you get the likes of David Marr and Marian Wilkinson in their book Dark Victory (with a title like that - you know they're not pushing an agenda....) carrying on like pork chops about how terrible the Australian government is to these poor innocent people just because the Government wants to (Shock! Horror!) protect the sovereignty of it's borders. What you won't see however, are people like this bothering to deal with the difficult question of whether these people are actually refugees or not. Why bother to confront the difficult questions when you can get all emotional instead (Won't somebody think of the children!!!).

As Alexander Casella points out in this excellent review of their book,
"Second, the right to flee persecution does not entitle a refugee to choose his country of asylum freely. Once a refugee has reached safety, further movement to other countries is no longer covered under the asylum umbrella. If such movement occurs, it is defined as "secondary movement", that is to say, movement for the sake of convenience and not to flee persecution. In other words, it is the movement of refugees who already have asylum and are thus in no danger from persecution, as opposed to the flight of those for whom it is an imperative necessity."
Wow. And I always thought it was just pure luck that meant that those boat people arriving in Australia from the middle east got here by pure luck rather than by bypassing the thirty-odd countries that lie between their homeland and here.

Another issues which the whining lefties never deal with is also pointed out by Casella.
"Thus Australian law provides for automatic detention for anyone entering the country illegally. On an annual basis, Australia has a quota of some 12.000 resettlement slots for refugees, divided into "offshore" and "inshore". "Offshore" includes refugees who are accepted from abroad, namely either from refugee camps or people in pressing need of asylum. "Inshore" includes two categories; the first is composed of people who have entered Australia legally and who have made an asylum request during the validity of their visa. Such cases are generally given bridging visas while their application is being assessed and are accepted for resettlement if recognized as refugees.

The second includes people who have arrived illegally, are consequently detained, and have made an asylum request while in detention. Such cases, if recognized as refugees needing asylum, are subsequently released and accepted for resettlement.

The system hinges on the fact that for every "inshore" case accepted, there is, within the annual quota, one "offshore" slot less for a refugee in dire need of assistance. "
So...does that mean that for every queue jumper that is allowed to stay in Australia, a genuine refugee who wasn't able to pay the $5 000 per person to people smugglers to get them to Australia is forced to miss out? That sucks. But then again, those people waiting in refugee camps somewhere overseas, don't provide anywhere near as good a photo opportunity or political mileage as those who are detained attempting to illegally enter Australia do they?

Of course, if those people who where so interested in seeing the right thing done would focus their efforts on those who actuality deserved their help rather than those who provided the prettiest pictures for the Australian media, they might actually get some good work done. But I won't hold my breath waiting for that to happen....

And that's another thing, I'm sick and tired of seeing bullshit sob stories from the Australian Bolshevik's Collective (Your ABC - not if you're a white heterosexual mainstream Australian it's not....) about those people who have been denied entry to Australia as refugees - because they're found to not be refugees (see that whole thing about secondary movement) committing self-harm to themselves because they're not getting their way. People who are willing to commit acts of premeditated politically motivated violence and themselves and others in order to force a Government to change it's policies are just the sort of stable well-meaning citizens who can contribute to a healthy society aren't they.....

Hang on..... acts of premeditated politically motivated violence. Sounds awfully familiar doesn't it. Let me see here
The Intelligence Community is guided by the definition of terrorism contained in Title 22 of the US Code, Section 2656f(d):

—The term “terrorism” means premeditated, politically motivated violence perpetrated against noncombatant targets by subnational groups or clandestine agents, usually intended to influence an audience.

—The term “international terrorism” means terrorism involving the territory or the citizens of more than one country.

—The term “terrorist group” means any group that practices, or has significant subgroups that practice, international terrorism.
Food for thought isn't it...

This rant was brought to you by the letters F for frustration, L for left wing and B for bastards. I now return you to the usual humerous but inane postings from myself.

The Two Towers: Special Special Edition


That's right - there's another version. Get the lowdown here.

heh




Now THIS would be something to see!

Last Thought For The Night

Just how good a song is One by Metallica.

Tuesday, December 16, 2003


Which Family Guy Character are you? Take the Quiz!

Which Family Guy Character are you? Take the Quiz!

Which Family Guy Character are you? Take the Quiz!

Which 'Family Guy' Character Are You?


Which Family Guy Character are you? Take the Quiz!

Sunday, December 14, 2003

Whoop!!!

NEWS.com.au | Gotcha: US captures Saddam (December 15, 2003) - to quote Bill Lawry - "Got 'im! Yes!!!!"
Trapped in a cellar, Saddam dug a hole and buried himself as U.S. soldiers moved into the house where he was hiding, an Iraqi official said Sunday.

"The American soldiers had to use shovels to dig him out," Entifadh Qanbar, spokesman for Governing Council member Ahmad Chalabi, told The Associated Press.

Qanbar, basing his account on reports from members of the U.S.-led occupation authority, said Saddam had a salt-and-pepper beard when he was captured. Soldiers photographed him, shaved the beard and photographed him again before running DNA tests, he said.

"The DNA test confirmed 100 percent Saddam Hussein's identity," he said.

More here


And the reaction of the Iraqi people to this?
NEWS.com.au | Hungry elephants hijack sugar trucks (December 7, 2003) - the moral of this story? Don't mess with Elephants when they're after the sweet goodness.

Elements of Truth?


When Shitty B-Grade Movies Get Something Right


Slasher movies. I'm not a big fan of the genre. I have better things to do than watch a number of oh-so-pretty people do stupid shit that means a 'psychotic' killer will kill them in a number of semi-creative ways. (Honestly, in some slasher movies, the killer's probably the only sane one in a world gone mad. But I digress.) But the one thing that really narks me about slasher movies is the assumption that being a psychotic serial killer somehow endows someone with immense physical prowess.

The act of donning a mask (it's usually a mask), a long-flowing jacket (or in the case of Scream, a robe kinda thing) and carrying a big knife somehow means you can move faster than people can see, you can wrestle anyone into submission (before you stab 'em, natch) or climb things that really shouldn't be climbable. Which is a genre convention I find immensely difficult to swallow.

Now, there was a slasher movie called 'Wishcraft' on cable last night, and it was playing in the background at work. Near as I could tell, it was about a kid who received a mysterious totem thingy in the mail, with a note attached saying it granted him three wishes. So he wished to go out with a cheerleader at his high school... the same time a psychotic killer starts murdering high school kids around the place. Who is incredibly strong, can get into stupidly inaccessible places without anyone noticing, so on and so forth.

And when the denoument comes, the psychotic killer is the one who sent the kid the box - and has already used his wishes to get his superpowers. And I was really impressed that the premise meant the psychotic killer could be the usual stupidly unbelievable 'psycho' actually made sense to act like he was!

So while it was nothing more than a slasher movie with a little extra hint of morality tale, I still enjoyed what I saw of it. And seeing the slasher, after stabbing a random victim, pulling out a full-on sword was a refreshing change as well. :)

Just thought I'd say.

Friday, December 12, 2003

What Makes Life 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%.
How about achieving 103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

What makes life 100%?
If
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented
as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then,

H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%

But,

A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%

And,

B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%

So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top.

And look how far .........

A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%

will take you.

Tuesday, December 09, 2003

Moi

Your
Ultimate Roleplaying Purity Score
CategoryYour ScoreAverage
Hacklust37.74%
Has conversations in between massacres
53.3%
Sensitive Roleplaying63.29%
Will talk after everyone important's been killed
54%
GM Experience71.01%
Ran a module once or twice
69.1%
Systems Knowledge90.25%
Played in a couple of campaigns
90.1%
Livin' La Vida Dorka40.23%
Has interesting conversations in public
62.8%
You are 64.07% pure
Average Score: 68.4%

Looked high and low for the "sets up simple straight-foreward two hour adventure and watches in horror as PC's career not only off the beaten path but into the orbit of a planet three dimensions away", but alas it wasn't there...

It Had To Happen.


Your
Ultimate Roleplaying Purity Score
CategoryYour ScoreAverage
Hacklust44.34%
Will kill for XP
53.3%
Sensitive Roleplaying50.63%
"But what's my motivation for this scene?"
54%
GM Experience56.52%
Puts the players through the wringer
69.1%
Systems Knowledge82.49%
Played in a couple of campaigns
90.1%
Livin' La Vida Dorka49.43%
Has interesting conversations in public
62.8%
You are 59.35% pure
Average Score: 68.4%

"Puts players through the wringer." Hah. As if.

Sunday, December 07, 2003

Stupid, Stupid Judge.

OK, It might sound like I'm just bashing the legal system more but...

Though I don't know all the facts it appears to me there's a judge out there who is seriosly in need of an ass kicking, and for once I'm tempted to do it. I am not a violent person by nature, but this twit is obviosly a moron and has allready given me a wy out of any charges.... suply me with alcohol.

For those not up to date with current affairs during the week just gone a man was aquitted of the crime of indesent dealings (I don't know exactly what he did nor do I realy want to) with an ELEVEN (11) year old girl, as he was found to be too drunk to be considered responsible for his actions. I don't think I need dwell on this level of stupidity, how can such a concept be justified. I feel stupider just for hearing it actualy happend.

Now that the precident has been set (and IMHO at least 100 years of legal system and evolution have gone down the drain) I would like to know if a: those seeking retribution for the crime can do so if they get significantly drunk at the time and get off sighting precidence, and, b: can you still be done for drink driving ("Sorry officer but I wouldn't be drink driving if I wasn't so drunk").

So for the first time I think we have a winner for the (drum roll..........) "Rappo's Asshole of the Week Award". This week it goes to the idiot judge who let such a defence stand (unsure of the twits name), lets all hope the moron gets punched in the face realy hard by a drunk guy who gets off on the precident they set.



(No, realy I want to know if I can sight this and get off criminal charges, think of all the dunken fun that could be had- mwahhahahahahahahahahahaha - lets go start a riot in the Queen St mall, maybe even do some cristmas "shopping" - AKA looting)

What Does Spike Jonze Really Think?


Check out An Interview with Spike Jonze.

And remember. The camera's rolling.

Have You Ever...


Have you ever found yourself coming up with a quip you're really proud of but never get a chance to say because the leading question is never asked?
I just had one of those moments...
James A: yep - this is Boxing Day release - am thinking we have to make it third year in a row :)

also - are you interested in trying to find out if/where the Extended Editions are being shown on the big screen?
Josh: Uh.... mildly... but I don't fancy spending eight hours watching them all in a cinema....

So, naturally, I was waiting for him to question me... ideally, along the lines of "Why would you want to know if you don't want to watch them?"

So I could off-handedly reply, "So I can say, 'Oh, by the way, they're showing the Extended Editions on the big screen at [fill in the blank]' and make all the ladies swoon with my geeky knowledge."

But, of course, he never did, so now instead of an amusing remark, that line now stands as testament to the world that I think way too much about some things. Oh, and that I'm a very sad person.

Go on, shoo. Chortle to yourself about how superior you are. See if I care. Mongrel.

Saturday, December 06, 2003

The ACCC are definently the good guys, even if they can't get that judges head out of his own ass

Ok, for those who don't know it is now illegal in australia to have a mod chip installed in you playstation as the previos rulling (were the ACCC kicked sony out of court) has now been overturned. Our legal system sucks. Now though it is true that modchips allow the use of illegaly copied games, they also allow the use of imported games, as sony - being the evil pricks they are - have region coding in they're games, ever since the original Playstation. I am actually fairly sure they came up with the system, which has now been adopted by the film industry for DVDs. Now I am of course a big fan of the Playstion and PS2 but I still think sony are being evil pricks. Mandatory quote time the following snippets are from the Australian Financial Review article ACCC attacks Sony victory.


"The ACCC believes region coding is detrimental to consumers as it severely limits their choice and, in some cases, access to competitively priced goods,"


The "chipping" case also attracted the attention of the Office of the US Trade Representative earlier this year. In March, it noted the US motion picture industry was "increasingly concerned" about Australian law at that time as it allowed the legal modification of DVD players in Australia.

According to legal sources, Sony's victory might mean the modification of DVD players is now also illegal.


Fun Fun fun. So there we have it. Now correct me if I'm wrong but we do have laws against anti-comptitive behavior don't we?? Also if you can't chip a PS2 or PS1, you can't play backup's of original games you own, and I mean BACKUP's, not Illegal copies. Form an article on ZNET sony have told us we do not have the right to backup the software they produce, this seems a bit rude to me, as I'm sure if a disk got dammaged they wouldn't replace it, we've seen that before with DVD's that suffer for DVD rot. The maufacturer will not replace the defective media, and I'm sure sony wouldn't either.
Parallel importing of music was a great thing as it did drop prices, but while Region coding exists, it's not plausable for either for PS1/PS2 or DVD.
What I would like to see about now is a consumer group attempt to sue Sony or force them to produce Pre-chipped PS1/PS2's (even if they stick with no backups, removing the region coding would be good). Now in my oppinion, a attack like this sould win, as it otherwise would be anti-competitive. Once this is done we could send a consumer group against the film industry to deal with the DVD regioning.


The case was given to sony as their region coding also prevents piracy as it creates a barrier to useing illegal copies. I think it is important to note that such resoning could also be used to remove CD and DVD burners form the shelves. Backups can be created on tape, large files could be moved on thumb drives. Only certain regestereg companys would be allowed to own or use burners, you bring in the thumb drive(s) or tape and they produce a CD or DVD for you. Obviosly this would be stupid, but it is possible as if you couldn't use a DVD or CD burner you couldn't create an illegal copy of any sortware. Somethings gotta break, and I'm voting for Sony, followed by the film industry (run by Americans, I think).


If you want a good laugh check out The Best Page In The Universe

Thursday, December 04, 2003

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

Hmmm...interesting
This is the new Java Desktop Environment from Sun Microsystems

Monday, December 01, 2003

Anal

No folks, I'm not here to talk about sex, but rather to describe the way some people act when it comes to critiquing movies. And there's no more anal a web-site to find such critiques that moviemistakes.com.

Now, when you combine this retentive hobby of picking on all the minor (and sometimes major) errors and mishaps that occur in a film, with the fanatical analysis movies like the two (released so far) LOTR movies, you have the possibility of witnessing some very scary occurrences. However, all is not as bad as you might think. Witness Peter Jackson taking on the mistakes pointed out and explaining what happened.

Are you a bright?

Australia is nowhere near as hypocritical about religious tolerance as America is, but it's an interesting article, nonetheless (as well as being an interesting experiment!)