Confidence

Warning - major blog/livejournal cliche to follow.
Confidence is a weird thing. Everybody has it in differing amounts. And those amounts can and often will vary immensely depending upon what the issue is you're confronting. Take me and public speaking for instance. The conventional wisdom seems to tell you that public speaking is seen to be one of the most fearsome tasks you can ask any person to perform. Yet for me, I will barely blink. Stick me in front of a room of a thousand strangers and I will have no problem and I normally will have no problem talking for as long as you want on almost any topic you ask (and sometimes even making some sense). So you might say in this respect I can appear to be a pretty self-confident guy.

There are other things however, which will scare me witless. Take dancing for example. My lack of coordinated rhythm is rather frightening to me. The limit of my repertoire extends to moshing (where you only need to be able to throw yourself into the closest person to you and bounce off intact) and head-banging (and I've never even equipped myself wither the long hair necessary for proper head-banging, so I'm a bit of a failure there as well). There are plenty of other things that scare me. Probably a list too long to start on.

I did one of those things tonight.

No, it wasn't illegal.

Was it the right thing to do?

I don't know. Possibly ask me in a few weeks?

Do I feel happy to have done it?

Yes/No/I'm not really sure. I think the most overwhelming feeling I am experiencing at the moment is 'relieved'. Rather than dwelling on this thing, I can take whatever result I get (and there is one I would prefer over the other) and move on with my life.

Am I going to spill any more details or am I going to remain all dark and mysterious?

No, I don't think I'm going to say anything more about it at the moment (unless you get me incredibly, and I mean incredibly drunk).

Why on earth then did I bother blogging this if I don't want to talk about it?

Good question. Maybe I just wanted to get things straight in my own head. Maybe this is my way on confronting this confidence issue. Heck, seeing as I could be viewed as having already done one possibly incredibly stupid thing tonight, I've decided why stop there?

Maybe I'll just delete this in the morning. I don't know.
Major blog/livejournal cliche ends.

How very deep and meaningful. Or what a load of utter toss. I'm not sure which.