GMing The Mature Way

From rec.games.frp.misc:

It finally happened. I just absolutely snapped.

It was a perfectly crafted mission. I had taken all the scenarios into
account, I was ready, it was gonna be the best one yet.

Then the stupid players groused it all up.

Now when I create a adventure, I place most of the encounters, patrols, traps,
etc ahead of time, based on what i think the chief Big Baddie would do, that
way if the players overcome the defenses or whathaveyou, its more of an
accomplishment, because they know I'm not just making stuff up to throw at
them.

So there they are, attempting to sneak into the ruins of the city to ambush the
bad guys, and what do they do?

They avoid EVERY SINGLE FRAKKIN TRAP PATROL ALARM SENTRY TWIG LEAF BLADE OF
FRAKKIN GRASS I SET UP.

That was the one scenario I hadnt taken into account, that they would
infiltrate the place perfectly (not easy with the defenses I had set up, I
never seen so many natural 10s in my life dammit - i swear they fixed the dice)

SO the adventure that was supposed to last us the whole weekend was over in
about an hour.

I then did what any GM in my position would do

I unleashed my trademark Giant Mutant Cyberlemmings.

"What??"
"I said, the door to the vehicle compund smashes open, and with a roar what
appears to be a giant grey cyborg lemming charges you."
"No seriously man, whats happening?"
"I just told you, that giant lemming is getting close, what are you doing?"
"um...I'm...shooting it?"
"well roll then."

they lost a couple NPCs to the undead chipmunks, and you wouldnt believe how
many clips they tore through when the squealing meemees attacked. They seemed
to be having a good time after they cleared out the nest of zombie tadpoles
tho.

I think there's something in that for all of us, don't you?